The Beast Himself

There are some figures that are fascinating even though you know you should not be fascinated by them. If this wasn't the case, there wouldn't be such demand for books on serial killers, which personally I find quite horrific. However, I have my own weaknesses, and recently have given in to one of them.
With my taste in the paranormal and the occult, it is of course an occult figure about whom I am simultaneously wary of and curious about: Aleister Crowley.
His is a name I have always been aware of, although I really have no idea how or why. Until relatively recently I had great trouble distinguishing between him and Dennis Wheatley. When I think of all the times during my twenties that I hovered fascinated over Dennis Wheatley books in second hand bookshops but then left them because of this misapprehension that Wheatley was the occult practitioner, I could kick myself. Now that I know how great Wheatley's books are, I never come across them.
And of course reading Wheatley, specifically The Devil Rides Out, has only increased my fascination with Crowley because the villain, Mocata, was based on him. Wheatley knew Crowley and got on with him by all accounts, despite the dire warnings about the dangers of involvement with practitioners of black magic that he put at the front of his books.
Add to this Crowley's appearance as a character in the recent Alone in the Dark video game (albeit with an American accent) and my curiosity has now reached too high a pitch and I have given in. I am determined to move Crowley out of the shady recesses of my imagination and actually find out who he was, what he did, and see whether my instinctive feelings about him are justified or just some hangover from an impressionable childhood.
I also want to know what Crowley's writings are like; I have been writing a couple of short stories recently (which, as with everything I write, turned themselves into a Wheatly-esque thriller) that centre around a Crowley-like occult figure and I decided some research was in order. That was the excuse anyway, and a pretty fine one it is too!
So off to the bookshop I went, only to find that Waterstones has removed its Occult section and replaced it with 'Mind, Body and Spirit', which equates to angels, astrology and - just so I don't get too despondent- books on ghost hunting, hooray. While looking fruitlessly for all the Crowley books that I know were there only a few months ago, I picked up a copy of The Ghost Hunter's Casebook by Bowen Pearse, revisiting the paranormal investigations of Andrew Green. As J said quite rightly, most people probably find a section labelled 'Occult' off-putting or intimidating. Personally I found having one labelled 'MBS' quite dismal, but that's just me.
But back to the Crowley hunt and it was home to the internet and the marvellous Abebooks; three volumes were ordered and quickly dropped through the letter box.
First, a novel, as Wheatley was not the only one to create a character based on Crowley: The Magician by W Somerset Maugham. I am very happy about this; after reading Cakes and Ale last year I wanted to read more Maugham so I get to combine this with my Crowley obsession and it feels a little more literary and a little less prurient.
Secondly, some of Crowley's own writing, The Book of the Law. A lovely small red book with the title in gold leaf and inside, after the printed text, is a facsimile of Crowley's original manuscript. This book was 'dictated' to him by a spirit, he claimed. I am fascinated by things like this, despite being sceptical.
Thirdly, the book I am really excited about, Do What Thou Wilt: a life of Aleister Crowley by Lawrence Sutin. The picture on the front is not prepossessing, and it is hard to see how Crowley could have held such a fascination for so many people, but I hope this book will make that clearer.
I was too impatient though and began reading The Occult by Colin Wilson while I waited for the books to arrive. This monumental book covers all aspects of the occult in a fascinating and very readable style and describes the lives of a number of important occult figures such as Paracelsus, John Dee and, of course, Crowley. I am currently only a few pages away from a chapter called The Beast Himself, and I can hardly wait.
My only concern is that the story of Crowley is going to turn out to be a rather ordinary one of a charismatic but unstable drug-addict, with more self-belief than ability. There is something quite attractive about those shadowy figures of fear that we all carry in our heads, and a part of me wants Crowley to live up to it.